Hey Joshua! Your website is very compelling and attractive! I like the main picture, it looks very cool. In your comment right above this it reads in part "...Please leave comment..." I think you meant to put "a" in front of the word "comment." Also when I click on the comment link on your homepage it tells me that I cannot view your comment wall. Maybe your blog is not set to public? I am not sure what is going on there. In the sentence that reads "The book was light orange with an elastic band to hold pages in place." I think you meant to say "...elastic band to hold the pages in place" rather than "...elastic band to hold pages in place." Your story is excellent and well thought out. I like how you brought the story into the modern day. It really makes the reader able to relate better I think.
I'm guessing you're an architecture major because it really seemed like you knew what you were talking about in this story. I'm not gonna lie, I was very much lost during the second half when you were describing the architectural details, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. Specificity adds a sense of realism, I would rather read an overly-accurate story that forces me to look up definitions, than a story where the author did no research. That's called learning after all!
Speaking of learning, you are the first story to make it onto my "words I don't know" list. Palimpsest, now there's a twenty-dollar word if I ever heard one.
Anyways, I really liked your story. The motivation of the main character was very relatable, and his relationship with his uncle is a nice classic "wise mentor" dynamic. Was the uncle character perhaps inspired by someone in your life who inspired you similarly?
I really liked your image choices for your project. I thought they went well with what the whole thing seems to be about thus far. So far, you have "Foundation Plan" posted, which I found interesting. Is that meant to be a bit of an introduction? Like an introduction in the form of a story? If so, I think it will come together as the whole project is created, but alone it left me wondering if that was the case. Either you already know a ton about architecture, or you've done your research. That much is very clear to me, and that's great! It seems almost over my head, but that's just the way things work when I'm not entirely familiar with specific topics. I like that you have a link to your comment wall on all pages, made it very easy for me to click over to here. The other thing that leads me to thinking this is an introduction is the lack of an author's note.
Hi~ Nice work with your storybook so far. Your handle on vocabulary is impressive. With social media and all that I'm used to fairly basic sentence structure. I'm here after "The Shikhara Detail" was posted so I was wondering if it's necessary for me to read "The Foundation Plan" before continuing with the other stories? I ask that because while "The Foundation Plan" is a great name for an introduction but it confused me initially. Maybe you could put something like 1/4, 2/4, etc on the page. I think it could be helpful to make a note so future visitors know what order the stories should be read in. You've done a nice job describing the scenes around Deepak. I'm visually oriented so I appreciate the clear mental image that comes up when reading. I look forward to reading the rest of the story!
Hello Joshua, I really love your home slide, it is a very detailed and beautiful image that made me want to click on the next page. I also really enjoy how your website flows together when you scroll up and down. I enjoy how descriptive your writing is, even in the first couple sentences about the sketch book I can envision it in my head, in the Foundation Plan. The way the two stories flow really makes the stories easier to read and kept me engaged. My favorite part of these stories and the theme to your story book is the mixing of the fictional characters and those from the epic. It’s a mix of both worlds which brings the story to life for those of us who did not grow up hearing the story. I wonder what characters you will introduce in the next story and how they will interact with Deepak.
I love your storybook! This is a great concept and is executed very, very well. I have to ask – did you research Indian temple architecture just for this class, or was it a pre-existing interest of yours? Either way, you did a very thorough job of it. The characters of Deepak and his uncle provide, like you say in the Author’s Note, a counterbalancing modern foil to the ancient structures, acting somewhat like a mediator between us and things that are a little to far, both culturally and temporaly, for us to immediately understand.
One idea, though I realize it would be labor intensive, would be to add images of some of the specific architectural features you mention so that those of us with more limited architectural experience than you can more accurately visualize the temples as they are, and not as strange amalgams of half-remembered Bollywood movies and Indiana Jones. (Which is what tends to happen subconsciously, I think.)
Your storybook website is very pleasing to the eye. India has many temples so I am sure you had a lot of pictures to choose from. I can tell that you spent some time looking for your banner images and I think you picked some great ones.
Now to your story, "The Shikhara Detail." I really appreciate this story and how you were able to teach through it. I learned a lot about Indian temples that I did not know before. I also think your title is super fitting. Detail is one thing you did not leave out. This is actually one of the most detailed stories I've read in this class. Well done!
There were some parts of the story where I was a little confused though. I had a bit of trouble following the two boys and did not know they were from different historical periods until I read your author's note. I am not sure exactly how to clear it up though, because both boys and time frames are crucial to the story.
Hi Joshua! I really like the concept of this story. It reminds me a lot of the Magic Treehouse books. I love how your home page gives us a glimpse of the stories to come, even if it is only a single image. But those images pique my interest, and make me want to know the story that that image represents. I also love how you use imagery within this story itself. It really brings the story to life and makes me feel like I'm there with Deepak. I did struggle to follow the scene with the mural and the ball of light a little. I couldn't tell if this was happening on the wall, or floating in the middle of the room. Also, why did the ball of light present the scroll to Deepak? I do have a few notes, too. The author's note on the first page is excellent. It sets up the story, and makes me want to read more. But, on the first story, it doesn't serve much purpose. I've already read that particular author's note, and it doesn't add much to the second story. It seems like you drew on your own experiences. Perhaps you could talk about that. For the second story, you could talk about the source material. Go more in depth about the story of the young architect, or talk about Hanuman trying to eat Arka.
Hey Joshua, I just want to start off by saying that I really enjoyed the layout of your website. Your first picture is extremely breathtaking and it really made a lot more curios about you stories and it made me keep wanting to explore your site. I was very intrigued by your intro. I know close to nothing about architecture, so it definitely peaked my interest that your goal was to tell a story and simultaneously explore and explain the intricacies of Indian architecture. Now, regarding your stories. I really enjoyed reading them. Your passion and interest for architecture show by the way you write your stories and describe the imagery of them. I really liked that. It made everything come to life, and it made it a little easier to understand. Overall your stories were really pleasant and I enjoyed reading them. One suggestion I do have, is that you should probably consider changing your authors notes and making it relevant for each story. I was a bit confused when I read the authors note on the first story and it was the same as the intro. I find author stories really useful to expand on something that does not fit in the story, and I think a different, more explanatory note could benefit your stories a lot.
Hey Joshua, I read the Shikara Detail and boy was it detailed. It wasn't just the detail of the architectural bits, but the imagery was great (not that the architectural detail wasn't great). It's really cool that you are able to tie in your interests into your writing so that it stands out from other writing. As I was saying, the little imagery and scene setting details were great. I especially like the introductory paragraph as you depict Deepak waking up and getting used to his surroundings. The monkey, or Hanuman langur, was also a refreshing character from the way that you used dialogue. It wasn't traditional dialogue with words, but it was a depiction with body language that made it what it was. It also seemed as though there was a mixture of fact and fiction within the story which I liked. Some of the more detailed info on the temples went over my head, but the story itself kept me in.
Hi Joshua, First, I really liked the aesthetic of your project. It’s very appealing to the eye! As for the stories, I liked that I was able to see your personality shine through your stories. For instance, I can tell are super interested in architecture by the way you described the buildings and your theme in general. If I remember correctly, your introductory post mentioned you being an architecture so bravo being able to incorporate that into your project. You are super talented as a writer. You were able to use great detail to explain what was happening. I will say they seem more like pieces of a novel than stories, but that isn’t necessarily a critique. If I were to offer a change it would be to clarify your author’s note a bit. I was a bit confused as to which story the author note was supposed to be talking about. Either way great project!
WWW Comment: Hey Joshua, I love the images that you used for your storybook. They are absolutely beautiful and work with the theme of you stories. Also, the formatting of your storybook on the home page is great. This is something that I will definitely incorporate in my storybook. I liked that the name of your main character was an Indian name. It works with the theme of you story. Also, I like how your stories are completely original. Most of the stories being used in other storybooks are based of myths or from the epics, but yours were purely fictional and original which is very impressive. I would say that maybe add some dialogue to your story because it will definitely help with the flow of the story. Also, it keeps the reader more engaged in the story. Overall, I really enjoyed your storybook and I am looking forward to reading more of your stories.
Hi Josh! Great story. The one I really enjoyed was the temple story. First off, your writing was extremely descriptive and very interesting. My favorite scene was when the boy was at the temples waiting for the sunrise. The description of the ninety-degree angles, as well as the sun rising with it, was a crystal clear scene that was very easy to imagine in my mind. The knowledge you show about the temples also really helped the story. I know nothing about the temples, but your descriptions helped me understand what was happening with them. Did you have to do research about the temples or did you already know about them before this class? The last thing I wanted to go over was the construction of your website. Overall I think it looks very good and there don't seem to be any major problems. Great story and good luck with the rest of the semester.
Hi Joshua, First off, I am happy to have come across your storybook for the first time! It is filled with wonderful content and alot of it! Although this feedback is supposed to be geared towards the authors notes I did want to mention and praise you on other aspects really quick too. I really liked how your homepage was set up and as you scrolled down the story links were there along with the pictures of that story. Having done a portfolio myself, I am not sure it a homepage authors note is expected for a storybook of not but I thought is was a good idea to have it. An author's notes for the overall website. Your stories obviously all have a lot of thought and care put into them and the notes reflect the hard work. Overall a very good job not retelling the story but providing the backstory and the thought put into them.
Hey Joshua! Your project is looking really good! It is very aesthetically pleasing. I was not expecting an overall author's note. I think that would be cool to incorporate into my portfolio. I like that you mentioned the main two characters. I would like to know more but I understand that the stories will do that. I think you did a good job explaining your inspiration in the author's note. Overall, your project was done very well. I can tell you put effort into it and it has paid off. The collection of stories flow together and the author's not is a good introduction to your project.
Hey Joshua, thus far, I love what you have come up with for your Storybook! It is interesting how you included an authors note of the overall storybook, as it allows me to get information from previous and upcoming stories! Furthermore, I think your additional writing of so much imagery was very helpful in being able to place myself in the story, and picture myself seeing it if I was actually there. Your imagination is clearly seen in this, as your stories seem to come from you, and not from other stories that are often based off of originals from class. This is a nice aspect because I am reading things I would not quite expect. Overall, I think you have done a great job thus far!
Hi Joshua! Wow great job with your project. I really liked the image you chose in the Konark Dialogue the Final Critique story. It felt very accurate to what I was imagining in my head. I really liked the dialogue that you include in your writing. I like when people use a lot of dialogue between characters because it makes the story seem more realistic to me. Also, I appreciated the little details you included in your story because I think it helps to paint a better picture of the scenes that you are creating for your characters. I think you balanced the perfect amount of narration into your story without covering up the dialogue that you had put in place already. I really enjoyed reading all your stories and I hope that you have a great rest of your semester!
Hey Joshua! I wanted to say, great job with your storybook!! When I first clicked it, it was so aesthetically pleasing with so many different pictures. It definitely fascinated me and I enjoyed going through the pictures! I also liked how the purpose of your storybook is dialogues and I love how detailed vivid you were with it. When there was not any dialogue, you made your surroundings of your story very vivid and detailed so we could not miss any point. And your author's note, I really liked how you added your background and how you got your story. It just makes the story more meaningful! Overall, your story was fantastic! I can tell you put a lot of hard work and effort into this because it was well done!
This storybook was both incredibly well thought out and very well written! Even though I know absolutely nothing about architecture, I was still so invested in this young architect solving the historical engineering puzzle. I absolutely love what you did with the dream sequence, and how vivid your descriptions were. The other impressive part was how well you explained your thought process in the Author’s Notes. Usually, if I was confused about any of the context in the story I could read the Author’s Note and it would clarify things for me very well. The one part that was a little confusing to me was trying to establish that when you referred to the loadstone, capstone, and Amalaka they all meant the same thing. After rereading the two middle stories, I was able to figure that out, but it might help to clarify that in the Author’s Note for people who are less familiar with the legend you are describing. I really enjoyed reading your storybook and I think you do an excellent job wrapping everything up!
Wow! You have some of the most stunning pictures I've seen for a story book for our class. I do not consider myself super knowledgeable on architecture, but I think these pictures alone can be appreciated by anyone and give great insight into the diversity and richness of Indian culture. Is there a reason you chose these temples? Also, your stories itself were great too. I think your twists were creative and captivating. More importantly, I think your personality shone through your stories. I noticed the architecture references which clearly are something important to you. I think it makes your stories unique and symbolize it is 'yours'. My only recommendation is to add more pictures to show what you are talking about. Maybe some visual cues about time periods or the types of architecture you talk about. I might not be able to read more given the end of our class but great job!! I really loved your page.
Hi Joshua! I love your use of pictures. They are all so beautiful. Could you add more even? I also have an appreciation for architecture, but you even lost me sometimes. So I was incredibly thankful that you included some graphs. If you wanted to add more to your author's notes you could add more detail and definitions. This way you can have your super detailed wording, but you don't loose your readers and they can pay attention to the plot of your story! You do an excellent job wrapping up the story! I can't think of a better way to end it. Great job!!!
I have to say that was one of the most detailed storybooks I have read this semester. I think it is awesome that you are able to include so much detail about the story in your writing. You obviously have a gift for creating an image in the readers' minds. I have really struggled to include the extra details that you included in your story within my own storybook. Beyond your use of imagery, I really liked how you broke the story into small, digestible bits for the readers when it comes to the dialogue. Often times it is difficult to discern when one speaker is done and another has started, but when you break each speakers' part into separate paragraphs like you have it makes it a ton easier to read. Congrats on finishing the semester, and great work!
Hi Joshua! I really like the overall look of your website. The website is easy to navigate between each page. The pictures you used really fit well with the story. The layout of the images you chose to use as navigation on the home page on your website looks very good. I know it is not needed for your navigation, however, I think it would look very good if you continued that design to the other web pages on your website. The only thing I would change about your website would be the size of your link to your comment wall. This is because I completely didn't see it when I first went through each web page on your website. If you just change the size of the font to the same size of the font as the rest of the website I think that would help the future readers out a lot.
Hey Joshua! Your website is very compelling and attractive! I like the main picture, it looks very cool. In your comment right above this it reads in part "...Please leave comment..." I think you meant to put "a" in front of the word "comment." Also when I click on the comment link on your homepage it tells me that I cannot view your comment wall. Maybe your blog is not set to public? I am not sure what is going on there. In the sentence that reads "The book was light orange with an elastic band to hold pages in place." I think you meant to say "...elastic band to hold the pages in place" rather than "...elastic band to hold pages in place." Your story is excellent and well thought out. I like how you brought the story into the modern day. It really makes the reader able to relate better I think.
ReplyDeleteStalder, Thank you for the edit suggestions. Noted and Changed!
ReplyDeleteI'm guessing you're an architecture major because it really seemed like you knew what you were talking about in this story. I'm not gonna lie, I was very much lost during the second half when you were describing the architectural details, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. Specificity adds a sense of realism, I would rather read an overly-accurate story that forces me to look up definitions, than a story where the author did no research. That's called learning after all!
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of learning, you are the first story to make it onto my "words I don't know" list. Palimpsest, now there's a twenty-dollar word if I ever heard one.
Anyways, I really liked your story. The motivation of the main character was very relatable, and his relationship with his uncle is a nice classic "wise mentor" dynamic. Was the uncle character perhaps inspired by someone in your life who inspired you similarly?
I look forward to reading more from you!
I really liked your image choices for your project. I thought they went well with what the whole thing seems to be about thus far. So far, you have "Foundation Plan" posted, which I found interesting. Is that meant to be a bit of an introduction? Like an introduction in the form of a story? If so, I think it will come together as the whole project is created, but alone it left me wondering if that was the case. Either you already know a ton about architecture, or you've done your research. That much is very clear to me, and that's great! It seems almost over my head, but that's just the way things work when I'm not entirely familiar with specific topics. I like that you have a link to your comment wall on all pages, made it very easy for me to click over to here. The other thing that leads me to thinking this is an introduction is the lack of an author's note.
ReplyDeleteHi~
ReplyDeleteNice work with your storybook so far. Your handle on vocabulary is impressive. With social media and all that I'm used to fairly basic sentence structure. I'm here after "The Shikhara Detail" was posted so I was wondering if it's necessary for me to read "The Foundation Plan" before continuing with the other stories? I ask that because while "The Foundation Plan" is a great name for an introduction but it confused me initially. Maybe you could put something like 1/4, 2/4, etc on the page. I think it could be helpful to make a note so future visitors know what order the stories should be read in. You've done a nice job describing the scenes around Deepak. I'm visually oriented so I appreciate the clear mental image that comes up when reading. I look forward to reading the rest of the story!
Hello Joshua,
ReplyDeleteI really love your home slide, it is a very detailed and beautiful image that made me want to click on the next page. I also really enjoy how your website flows together when you scroll up and down. I enjoy how descriptive your writing is, even in the first couple sentences about the sketch book I can envision it in my head, in the Foundation Plan. The way the two stories flow really makes the stories easier to read and kept me engaged. My favorite part of these stories and the theme to your story book is the mixing of the fictional characters and those from the epic. It’s a mix of both worlds which brings the story to life for those of us who did not grow up hearing the story. I wonder what characters you will introduce in the next story and how they will interact with Deepak.
Joshua,
ReplyDeleteI love your storybook! This is a great concept and is executed very, very well. I have to ask – did you research Indian temple architecture just for this class, or was it a pre-existing interest of yours? Either way, you did a very thorough job of it. The characters of Deepak and his uncle provide, like you say in the Author’s Note, a counterbalancing modern foil to the ancient structures, acting somewhat like a mediator between us and things that are a little to far, both culturally and temporaly, for us to immediately understand.
One idea, though I realize it would be labor intensive, would be to add images of some of the specific architectural features you mention so that those of us with more limited architectural experience than you can more accurately visualize the temples as they are, and not as strange amalgams of half-remembered Bollywood movies and Indiana Jones. (Which is what tends to happen subconsciously, I think.)
Thanks,
A.M.
Hi Joshua,
ReplyDeleteYour storybook website is very pleasing to the eye. India has many temples so I am sure you had a lot of pictures to choose from. I can tell that you spent some time looking for your banner images and I think you picked some great ones.
Now to your story, "The Shikhara Detail." I really appreciate this story and how you were able to teach through it. I learned a lot about Indian temples that I did not know before. I also think your title is super fitting. Detail is one thing you did not leave out. This is actually one of the most detailed stories I've read in this class. Well done!
There were some parts of the story where I was a little confused though. I had a bit of trouble following the two boys and did not know they were from different historical periods until I read your author's note. I am not sure exactly how to clear it up though, because both boys and time frames are crucial to the story.
Hi Joshua! I really like the concept of this story. It reminds me a lot of the Magic Treehouse books. I love how your home page gives us a glimpse of the stories to come, even if it is only a single image. But those images pique my interest, and make me want to know the story that that image represents. I also love how you use imagery within this story itself. It really brings the story to life and makes me feel like I'm there with Deepak. I did struggle to follow the scene with the mural and the ball of light a little. I couldn't tell if this was happening on the wall, or floating in the middle of the room. Also, why did the ball of light present the scroll to Deepak? I do have a few notes, too. The author's note on the first page is excellent. It sets up the story, and makes me want to read more. But, on the first story, it doesn't serve much purpose. I've already read that particular author's note, and it doesn't add much to the second story. It seems like you drew on your own experiences. Perhaps you could talk about that. For the second story, you could talk about the source material. Go more in depth about the story of the young architect, or talk about Hanuman trying to eat Arka.
ReplyDeleteHey Joshua, I just want to start off by saying that I really enjoyed the layout of your website. Your first picture is extremely breathtaking and it really made a lot more curios about you stories and it made me keep wanting to explore your site. I was very intrigued by your intro. I know close to nothing about architecture, so it definitely peaked my interest that your goal was to tell a story and simultaneously explore and explain the intricacies of Indian architecture. Now, regarding your stories. I really enjoyed reading them. Your passion and interest for architecture show by the way you write your stories and describe the imagery of them. I really liked that. It made everything come to life, and it made it a little easier to understand. Overall your stories were really pleasant and I enjoyed reading them. One suggestion I do have, is that you should probably consider changing your authors notes and making it relevant for each story. I was a bit confused when I read the authors note on the first story and it was the same as the intro. I find author stories really useful to expand on something that does not fit in the story, and I think a different, more explanatory note could benefit your stories a lot.
ReplyDeleteHey Joshua,
ReplyDeleteI read the Shikara Detail and boy was it detailed. It wasn't just the detail of the architectural bits, but the imagery was great (not that the architectural detail wasn't great). It's really cool that you are able to tie in your interests into your writing so that it stands out from other writing. As I was saying, the little imagery and scene setting details were great. I especially like the introductory paragraph as you depict Deepak waking up and getting used to his surroundings. The monkey, or Hanuman langur, was also a refreshing character from the way that you used dialogue. It wasn't traditional dialogue with words, but it was a depiction with body language that made it what it was. It also seemed as though there was a mixture of fact and fiction within the story which I liked. Some of the more detailed info on the temples went over my head, but the story itself kept me in.
Hi Joshua,
ReplyDeleteFirst, I really liked the aesthetic of your project. It’s very appealing to the eye! As for the stories, I liked that I was able to see your personality shine through your stories. For instance, I can tell are super interested in architecture by the way you described the buildings and your theme in general. If I remember correctly, your introductory post mentioned you being an architecture so bravo being able to incorporate that into your project. You are super talented as a writer. You were able to use great detail to explain what was happening. I will say they seem more like pieces of a novel than stories, but that isn’t necessarily a critique. If I were to offer a change it would be to clarify your author’s note a bit. I was a bit confused as to which story the author note was supposed to be talking about. Either way great project!
WWW Comment:
ReplyDeleteHey Joshua,
I love the images that you used for your storybook. They are absolutely beautiful and work with the theme of you stories. Also, the formatting of your storybook on the home page is great. This is something that I will definitely incorporate in my storybook. I liked that the name of your main character was an Indian name. It works with the theme of you story. Also, I like how your stories are completely original. Most of the stories being used in other storybooks are based of myths or from the epics, but yours were purely fictional and original which is very impressive. I would say that maybe add some dialogue to your story because it will definitely help with the flow of the story. Also, it keeps the reader more engaged in the story. Overall, I really enjoyed your storybook and I am looking forward to reading more of your stories.
Hi Josh! Great story. The one I really enjoyed was the temple story. First off, your writing was extremely descriptive and very interesting. My favorite scene was when the boy was at the temples waiting for the sunrise. The description of the ninety-degree angles, as well as the sun rising with it, was a crystal clear scene that was very easy to imagine in my mind. The knowledge you show about the temples also really helped the story. I know nothing about the temples, but your descriptions helped me understand what was happening with them. Did you have to do research about the temples or did you already know about them before this class? The last thing I wanted to go over was the construction of your website. Overall I think it looks very good and there don't seem to be any major problems. Great story and good luck with the rest of the semester.
ReplyDeleteHi Joshua,
ReplyDeleteFirst off, I am happy to have come across your storybook for the first time! It is filled with wonderful content and alot of it! Although this feedback is supposed to be geared towards the authors notes I did want to mention and praise you on other aspects really quick too. I really liked how your homepage was set up and as you scrolled down the story links were there along with the pictures of that story. Having done a portfolio myself, I am not sure it a homepage authors note is expected for a storybook of not but I thought is was a good idea to have it. An author's notes for the overall website. Your stories obviously all have a lot of thought and care put into them and the notes reflect the hard work. Overall a very good job not retelling the story but providing the backstory and the thought put into them.
Hey Joshua!
ReplyDeleteYour project is looking really good! It is very aesthetically pleasing. I was not expecting an overall author's note. I think that would be cool to incorporate into my portfolio. I like that you mentioned the main two characters. I would like to know more but I understand that the stories will do that. I think you did a good job explaining your inspiration in the author's note. Overall, your project was done very well. I can tell you put effort into it and it has paid off. The collection of stories flow together and the author's not is a good introduction to your project.
Hey Joshua, thus far, I love what you have come up with for your Storybook! It is interesting how you included an authors note of the overall storybook, as it allows me to get information from previous and upcoming stories! Furthermore, I think your additional writing of so much imagery was very helpful in being able to place myself in the story, and picture myself seeing it if I was actually there. Your imagination is clearly seen in this, as your stories seem to come from you, and not from other stories that are often based off of originals from class. This is a nice aspect because I am reading things I would not quite expect. Overall, I think you have done a great job thus far!
ReplyDeleteHi Joshua! Wow great job with your project. I really liked the image you chose in the Konark Dialogue the Final Critique story. It felt very accurate to what I was imagining in my head. I really liked the dialogue that you include in your writing. I like when people use a lot of dialogue between characters because it makes the story seem more realistic to me. Also, I appreciated the little details you included in your story because I think it helps to paint a better picture of the scenes that you are creating for your characters. I think you balanced the perfect amount of narration into your story without covering up the dialogue that you had put in place already. I really enjoyed reading all your stories and I hope that you have a great rest of your semester!
ReplyDeleteHey Joshua! I wanted to say, great job with your storybook!! When I first clicked it, it was so aesthetically pleasing with so many different pictures. It definitely fascinated me and I enjoyed going through the pictures! I also liked how the purpose of your storybook is dialogues and I love how detailed vivid you were with it. When there was not any dialogue, you made your surroundings of your story very vivid and detailed so we could not miss any point. And your author's note, I really liked how you added your background and how you got your story. It just makes the story more meaningful! Overall, your story was fantastic! I can tell you put a lot of hard work and effort into this because it was well done!
ReplyDeleteHi Joshua!
ReplyDeleteThis storybook was both incredibly well thought out and very well written! Even though I know absolutely nothing about architecture, I was still so invested in this young architect solving the historical engineering puzzle. I absolutely love what you did with the dream sequence, and how vivid your descriptions were. The other impressive part was how well you explained your thought process in the Author’s Notes. Usually, if I was confused about any of the context in the story I could read the Author’s Note and it would clarify things for me very well. The one part that was a little confusing to me was trying to establish that when you referred to the loadstone, capstone, and Amalaka they all meant the same thing. After rereading the two middle stories, I was able to figure that out, but it might help to clarify that in the Author’s Note for people who are less familiar with the legend you are describing. I really enjoyed reading your storybook and I think you do an excellent job wrapping everything up!
Hi Joshua!
ReplyDeleteWow! You have some of the most stunning pictures I've seen for a story book for our class. I do not consider myself super knowledgeable on architecture, but I think these pictures alone can be appreciated by anyone and give great insight into the diversity and richness of Indian culture. Is there a reason you chose these temples? Also, your stories itself were great too. I think your twists were creative and captivating. More importantly, I think your personality shone through your stories. I noticed the architecture references which clearly are something important to you. I think it makes your stories unique and symbolize it is 'yours'. My only recommendation is to add more pictures to show what you are talking about. Maybe some visual cues about time periods or the types of architecture you talk about. I might not be able to read more given the end of our class but great job!! I really loved your page.
Hi Joshua!
ReplyDeleteI love your use of pictures. They are all so beautiful. Could you add more even? I also have an appreciation for architecture, but you even lost me sometimes. So I was incredibly thankful that you included some graphs. If you wanted to add more to your author's notes you could add more detail and definitions. This way you can have your super detailed wording, but you don't loose your readers and they can pay attention to the plot of your story! You do an excellent job wrapping up the story! I can't think of a better way to end it. Great job!!!
Hey Joshua,
ReplyDeleteI have to say that was one of the most detailed storybooks I have read this semester. I think it is awesome that you are able to include so much detail about the story in your writing. You obviously have a gift for creating an image in the readers' minds. I have really struggled to include the extra details that you included in your story within my own storybook. Beyond your use of imagery, I really liked how you broke the story into small, digestible bits for the readers when it comes to the dialogue. Often times it is difficult to discern when one speaker is done and another has started, but when you break each speakers' part into separate paragraphs like you have it makes it a ton easier to read. Congrats on finishing the semester, and great work!
Brady
Hi Joshua!
ReplyDeleteI really like the overall look of your website. The website is easy to navigate between each page. The pictures you used really fit well with the story. The layout of the images you chose to use as navigation on the home page on your website looks very good. I know it is not needed for your navigation, however, I think it would look very good if you continued that design to the other web pages on your website. The only thing I would change about your website would be the size of your link to your comment wall. This is because I completely didn't see it when I first went through each web page on your website. If you just change the size of the font to the same size of the font as the rest of the website I think that would help the future readers out a lot.